So as I sit here at nearly midnight working on yet more physics (just kill me now) I have various music floating in the background (yay pandora and youtube!). One of the songs I fell upon (and liked) was "Closer" by Kings of Leon, I love that band, which led to a flood of Twilight based fan videos (this saga has ruined several things for me, not the least of which is violent vampire stories...sparkling vamps, seriously? See, this is what happens when Anne Rice becomes a fanatical christian). Now, don't get me wrong, I love a good romance just as much as the next girl (though Edward is a bit of a pansy for my taste- give me a guy with a few scars for various fights, a checkered past, and a tendency to give in to his animalistic side...then again, I have detailed my demented attractions to men here. But I digress...), but these stories are just...ridiculous.
If I met a man who began telling me where I could or couldn't go, who I could and could not see, what I should do with my life, etc. you better believe his ass would be booted to the curb quicker than...well, I don't know what, but it would be really quick, let me assure you. Like I said before, I don't prefer pansies, I dish out a lot of shit (yes, I am a real gem) and any guy who doesn't stand up to me gets bulldozed over very quickly. But seriously, I am living my life, I have plans I am working toward (med school, etc.). What kind of dude just shows up and is like, "hey, I know you got your thing going on but I am super awesome (and sparkly too!), so why don't you just drop everything and become the perfect [read nausea inducing- seriously, do they need to embrace each time one of them leaves to go to the restroom or makes a sandwich in the next room?] couple. Oh yeah, and by the way, I will make decisions that I deem to be best for you without consulting you and then act on these decisions, again without consulting you."
I have nothing against women who are or want to be stay at home mothers/wives, that can be the toughest job out there and I give them props for it, they are stronger and more capable than I. But to feed our youth the idea that young women need to wait around for the guy to come before their life can really start is not only archaic but also unhealthy, for the individual and any relationships they might have in the future. Could you imagine being the dude who ends up with the woman who has no life outside of him? Eeeek! That might work for a vampire who has no job and all the time in the world to ponder the amazingness of their lover's eyelashes as they sleep, but for the average Joe who has other shit they need to take care of, that seems like it would be a pain in the neck. Worse yet, it tells women that any plans they had pre-guy weren't really all that valid or important and therefore can be discarded without a care.
I am sure my upbringing in a female dominated family effects my perceptions. As well as the fact that I have had my fair share of all-consuming relationships in the past (I am a sucker for a troubled bad boy who sucks you in and pulls you down with him), so I will not pretend to be unbiased. But why oh why can't we create stories for youth that show a push and pull between the sexes? A story that revels in that wonderful contrast (and value) between men and women and displays collaboration versus submission. I wonder if the popularity of this type of story becomes increasingly attractive to women as the economy becomes increasingly unstable/difficult... it would make sense, why try to conquer your problems yourself when you can just wait for a guy to do it?
Besides, as far as I am concerned, what is the fun in rolling over? If a guy (or anyone for that matter) wants to win a battle of the wills with me they'll have to work for it. Scratch that, they will have to work extremely hard for it. Nothing worth having is ever had through default or automatic submission. :-P
Update: Because I enjoy being thorough, here is an article in PsychologyToday.com by Regina Berreca that had me cracking up in the middle of the chem building lobby as I waited for my class to start.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Of Love And Lasers
Ok boys, here is your warning upfront: if you don't want to read a post on the grooming habits of women, skip this post.
So for my new thing this week I got my first treatment of laser hair removal. I am pale with dark brown hair, meaning that even when I shave my legs, the hair below the skin is still visible. Oh the joys. On top of that, I have sensitive skin...can you say razor burned underarms in the summer? Yeah, not fun at all. So with the recession and crappy economic state of..well, just about everyone, it appears that cosmetic procedures, such as laser hair removal, are being hit pretty hard. In response, they are offering deals that are nearly impossible for me to pass up.
Anyhoo, back to the story at hand...
So I scheduled my appointment in the evening and was promptly greeted that night by my very nice nurse who would be wielding the laser for the next year (6 treatments 6 weeks apart, it isn't a quick process). She was knowledgeable and efficient, two very good things when someone is zapping your hair in some pretty sensitive areas. Speaking of which, I can now safely say, that a petite 5'4 nurse, we'll call her A, knows my lady bits better than me, my gynecologist, and my past lovers. Under her scrutinizing gaze and the unforgiving bright lights of the procedure room, nothing was left to the imagination. Ah, the joys of being a woman...
As for how it felt... overall, it wasn't very painful. But I will tell you this, it is nothing like getting waxed. I have been a dedicated waxee for years and while that pain is startling, it is very quick. Over before you really start if you have a good esthetician. The feeling of a laser is completely different. It feels as though many of your hairs are being repeatedly tweezed out of your body simultaneously. Over time that can feel a bit agitating. And this is one of the "pain-free" lasers. But it is worth it. So worth it. Come summer, I will be one stubble/razor burn-free lady strutting her stuff...in long capris and flowy long sleeved blouses because I will still be pale and burn like a crisp in the sun. But I will know I am hair free under all those layers, even if no one else in the outside world can tell! Hahahahaha!
So for my new thing this week I got my first treatment of laser hair removal. I am pale with dark brown hair, meaning that even when I shave my legs, the hair below the skin is still visible. Oh the joys. On top of that, I have sensitive skin...can you say razor burned underarms in the summer? Yeah, not fun at all. So with the recession and crappy economic state of..well, just about everyone, it appears that cosmetic procedures, such as laser hair removal, are being hit pretty hard. In response, they are offering deals that are nearly impossible for me to pass up.
Anyhoo, back to the story at hand...
So I scheduled my appointment in the evening and was promptly greeted that night by my very nice nurse who would be wielding the laser for the next year (6 treatments 6 weeks apart, it isn't a quick process). She was knowledgeable and efficient, two very good things when someone is zapping your hair in some pretty sensitive areas. Speaking of which, I can now safely say, that a petite 5'4 nurse, we'll call her A, knows my lady bits better than me, my gynecologist, and my past lovers. Under her scrutinizing gaze and the unforgiving bright lights of the procedure room, nothing was left to the imagination. Ah, the joys of being a woman...
As for how it felt... overall, it wasn't very painful. But I will tell you this, it is nothing like getting waxed. I have been a dedicated waxee for years and while that pain is startling, it is very quick. Over before you really start if you have a good esthetician. The feeling of a laser is completely different. It feels as though many of your hairs are being repeatedly tweezed out of your body simultaneously. Over time that can feel a bit agitating. And this is one of the "pain-free" lasers. But it is worth it. So worth it. Come summer, I will be one stubble/razor burn-free lady strutting her stuff...in long capris and flowy long sleeved blouses because I will still be pale and burn like a crisp in the sun. But I will know I am hair free under all those layers, even if no one else in the outside world can tell! Hahahahaha!
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Tiring of Tactfulness
I spend 99.9999999% of my days being tactful- determining the best way to word things to a frustrating colleague, watching my words as I explain a situation so there is no misunderstandings, gauging my dealings with strangers to determine just the right level of involvement and interest I should display or hold back to ensure there is no mistaking my interaction as anything but polite and brief.
Perhaps it is my 3 hours of sleep I have received in the last several nights, maybe it is the power struggle occurring at my work as everyone seeks to wrestle the power of executive director (which we are currently lacking) into their corner, or perhaps it is the endless hours I have spent studying physics with no noticeable improvement in my performance, but whatever the reason...I am getting sick of being constantly tactful. Always aware of how others will likely perceive me in any interaction. Don't get me wrong, being tactful fits perfectly into my control freak nature, I am intentionally and actively manipulating my interactions with people to get a desire outcome (admit it, you do to. Everyone does to some extent, it is part of survival). Today has just begun and I find myself resisting the urge to respond to several situations with a bluntness that would border on rude.
What freedom that would be. To respond with no investment in controlling the outcome. The fantasy of it titillates my thoughts but each time I come close, I pull back, unwilling to relinquish that control. I do not yearn to to become a rude, abrasive individual in all my interactions, I simply yearn for one moment, one instant in which I do not care. I am not there yet, but give me a few more sleepless nights and stressful mornings to match and I might reach that point quicker than expected.
Perhaps it is my 3 hours of sleep I have received in the last several nights, maybe it is the power struggle occurring at my work as everyone seeks to wrestle the power of executive director (which we are currently lacking) into their corner, or perhaps it is the endless hours I have spent studying physics with no noticeable improvement in my performance, but whatever the reason...I am getting sick of being constantly tactful. Always aware of how others will likely perceive me in any interaction. Don't get me wrong, being tactful fits perfectly into my control freak nature, I am intentionally and actively manipulating my interactions with people to get a desire outcome (admit it, you do to. Everyone does to some extent, it is part of survival). Today has just begun and I find myself resisting the urge to respond to several situations with a bluntness that would border on rude.
What freedom that would be. To respond with no investment in controlling the outcome. The fantasy of it titillates my thoughts but each time I come close, I pull back, unwilling to relinquish that control. I do not yearn to to become a rude, abrasive individual in all my interactions, I simply yearn for one moment, one instant in which I do not care. I am not there yet, but give me a few more sleepless nights and stressful mornings to match and I might reach that point quicker than expected.
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