So Butt Boy wants to learn country swing and wants me to be the guinea pig. I am all for that, I previously dated a guy who could really dance. Growing up in a rural ranching area, he learned how to do country western swing. And I am not just talking about a dip here and a turn there. I am talking full blown toss-you-up-in-the-air-and-make-you-look awesome-while-doing-absolutely-nothing-except-hanging-on-for-dear-life dancing. It was one of the best things about dating him. So of course now that Butt Boy has expressed an interest I am all in. The only problem: he doesn't want to do lessons.
This is fine and dandy if all he is looking for is to learn a basic moving step. But I want to fly! And that is not something you do without adult supervision. No one needs to be dropped on their head while attempting an Around The World. There is nothing fun about that. So I decided to take the initiative (what else is new?) and look up local dance lessons. I found a few, West Coast Swing this, East Coast Swing that. Then there was the "(*insert city name here*) Swingtime Dance." They even boasted about being the longest running swing dance in the state. So, naturally I thought I had hit gold. But as I read on, I soon found some interesting bits of information, such as, "we do not have the facilities for sexual activity on site," and "Dancing for mature couples." Me being the innocent little flower that I am initially thought these were addressing some issue they had in the past with younger people behaving immaturely at the dances... Oh how naive I am...
Nope, as it turns out they are talking about "dancing" in the biblical way. A full blown Swingers club. As in I will trade you this same-ol' same-ol' penis I have to sleep with every night for that shinny new one you brought with you. Yep, Swingers. Needless to say, I will not be inquiring about their next meet up. When it comes to THAT type of dancing, I am a single partner kinda gal.
So now I am back at square one. Oh well, maybe I will go see Butt Boy and "dance" with him
